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Forging Onward

Journey OnOk, so I want to start this post by saying thanks for reading.  Knowing that people are reading and even offering words of support or comments, has actually challenged me to look deeper into myself and my faith. Not only that but I’m spending more time thinking about this blog and what I’m going to write about next.

So, the last few days I actually felt that the need to get out my bible, something that hasn’t happened in a long time, in fact I had to look in a few places before I found it. I wasn’t really sure where I was going to start when I found it. I thought maybe I’d go to one of my favourite passages of scripture and read it, maybe I’d read through my old journal entries to see what I’d written in the past. I was disappointed to find that my journal was missing. I often find it interesting to read over my old journal entries from my quiet times, if you don’t journal your quiet times I highly recommend it. It’s quite interesting to see your journey with God.

I also keep copies of some of the prophetic words that I’ve received in the past in my bible case. (I don’t know where readers will stand on prophecies and the prophetic and I don’t want to open up a debate on that.) Until a few years ago I never wrote down prophetic words that I’d received, I just never thought of doing it. Then I attended a church where they used a small cassette recorder to record personal prophecies so you could listen back to them. Today I looked at a few of these prophecies but there is one that jumped out at me. I’m not going to copy it all here but here’s just a snip it of it.

“The Lord says the enemy is so jealous about you about your skills he would want to make you trip, especially with offence. The Lord is saying be careful not to fall into offence because that’s a trap that the enemy would try to put before you on your path.”

There is more to this word but that’s not really pertinent to this post. In hind sight I can look back on this and say that I didn’t heed this word. I know that I’ve taken on offense, some of it “justified”, some of it mine, some of it others. As I write this I wonder if I have missed out on the “good” parts of this word? Or if I was meant to find this word at this time to ensure that I broke the pattern in order to see the fulfillment of the rest of this word? I don’t know that anyone has the answer, but I now have the knowledge and have to make the decision as to what I’m going to do with it.

I don’t know what I’m going to do. I wish I could tell you that I‘m going to make a drastic change and transformation, but realistically, that’s not me. I need to noodle things around in my head and then work things out in my “heart” first. I want to know that whatever decision I come to, that I done it because of my own conviction and belief then because of someone else’s or blindly because it’s the “right” thing to do.

Honestly I think the next step for me is to start getting back into relationship with God on my own. Work things out with Him. Get back to a place where I am comfortable communing with God one-on-one and then work on corporate/group worship. I don’t know how long that will take, but it’s what I feel is the right thing to do right now.

  1. Brian
    January 7, 2011 at 11:05 pm

    Hey Eric,
    I’ve been following most of your posts (lurking I think they call it) but not commenting. I do want to say, I’m glad you’ve had the courage to stay on the journey. You mentioned offense(s) in your post tonight and I thought of a book that really helped me to look at offense and what I do with it in a very different light. Its not a cure all and definitely does not offer easy fixes but it suggests a process that I’ve been putting into practice and its changing my life. The book is called Total Forgiveness by R.T. Kendall.
    Your friend

    • January 7, 2011 at 11:19 pm

      Thanks Brian! I’ll see if I can find it and give it a read. I encourage the lurking, in fact that’s why I created the so people could read, comment and share.

  2. January 7, 2011 at 11:57 pm

    Honestly I think the next step for me is to start getting back into relationship with God on my own. Work things out with Him. Get back to a place where I am comfortable communing with God one-on-one and then work on corporate/group worship.

    Sounds like a great place to start.

  3. Rebecca O'Hara
    January 7, 2011 at 11:59 pm

    Hi Eric, I really enjoyed reading this….. I can look back on my life and speak from what I’ve been through and see how at times my thoughts and feelings about God have gone back and forth. I’ve doubted His love, how much He cares, how involved He is, if He’d come through for me?…..
    I’m ashamed that I doubt Him so quickly even so soon after He just answered a prayer of mine. I think it’s so true when it says “His ways are higher than our ways” and I can’t seem to wrap my head around everything. In fact, if I look at the two sides of this mysterious relationship, I’m the only inconsistent part of the equation. When I have the hardest times are when I’m focused on who God is in relation to me and not who I am in relation to Him!! The Bible reveals how consistent God is when it says that there is no shadow of turning with Him. His heart is toward us and patient with our journey fumbling around in a dark room. Keep wrestling with God, as long as it’s WITH God and I believe like Jacob you’ll come out better for it! 🙂

  4. ryan
    January 10, 2011 at 10:57 am

    Great post man.. and what you’re saying is exactly what I did.. got back to the lord.. just me and Him

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