Posts Tagged ‘Journaling’

Forging Onward

January 7, 2011 5 comments

Journey OnOk, so I want to start this post by saying thanks for reading.  Knowing that people are reading and even offering words of support or comments, has actually challenged me to look deeper into myself and my faith. Not only that but I’m spending more time thinking about this blog and what I’m going to write about next.

So, the last few days I actually felt that the need to get out my bible, something that hasn’t happened in a long time, in fact I had to look in a few places before I found it. I wasn’t really sure where I was going to start when I found it. I thought maybe I’d go to one of my favourite passages of scripture and read it, maybe I’d read through my old journal entries to see what I’d written in the past. I was disappointed to find that my journal was missing. I often find it interesting to read over my old journal entries from my quiet times, if you don’t journal your quiet times I highly recommend it. It’s quite interesting to see your journey with God.

I also keep copies of some of the prophetic words that I’ve received in the past in my bible case. (I don’t know where readers will stand on prophecies and the prophetic and I don’t want to open up a debate on that.) Until a few years ago I never wrote down prophetic words that I’d received, I just never thought of doing it. Then I attended a church where they used a small cassette recorder to record personal prophecies so you could listen back to them. Today I looked at a few of these prophecies but there is one that jumped out at me. I’m not going to copy it all here but here’s just a snip it of it.

“The Lord says the enemy is so jealous about you about your skills he would want to make you trip, especially with offence. The Lord is saying be careful not to fall into offence because that’s a trap that the enemy would try to put before you on your path.”

There is more to this word but that’s not really pertinent to this post. In hind sight I can look back on this and say that I didn’t heed this word. I know that I’ve taken on offense, some of it “justified”, some of it mine, some of it others. As I write this I wonder if I have missed out on the “good” parts of this word? Or if I was meant to find this word at this time to ensure that I broke the pattern in order to see the fulfillment of the rest of this word? I don’t know that anyone has the answer, but I now have the knowledge and have to make the decision as to what I’m going to do with it.

I don’t know what I’m going to do. I wish I could tell you that I‘m going to make a drastic change and transformation, but realistically, that’s not me. I need to noodle things around in my head and then work things out in my “heart” first. I want to know that whatever decision I come to, that I done it because of my own conviction and belief then because of someone else’s or blindly because it’s the “right” thing to do.

Honestly I think the next step for me is to start getting back into relationship with God on my own. Work things out with Him. Get back to a place where I am comfortable communing with God one-on-one and then work on corporate/group worship. I don’t know how long that will take, but it’s what I feel is the right thing to do right now.