Posts Tagged ‘Relying on God’

Stepping Out In Faith

March 13, 2011 2 comments

Westminster AbeyThey say that in the road to recovery you have to first admit that you are powerless over whatever it is that is plaguing you or causing your life to be unmanageable. Well, I think I’m prepared to admit that, I think I already have. I’m affraid and I am/have allowed fear to dictate how I am living my life.

I struggle at times about the existence of God. Although I may doubt Him, I cannot deny him. I know that may seem strange to some people, but it’s where I’m at. One of the things that I am learning more lately as I blog and I’m in this place, is that I need to rely on Him more and more to see me through. None of this is really all that new to me in theory. We all know that we need to rely on God and to trust Him. But do we really trust God and rely on Him?

As a child growing up we went through a long peroid of time where we relied on God as a family to provide our needs. Where we prayed and believed God to supply our needs, all of them, and God provided miraculously time and time again. During that time we never lacked for anything, at least anything that I can remember. We saw signs and wonders and I had the faith of a child that faith that believed that “with God all things are possible” – Mathew 19:26. Thinking of those times stirs the “spirit man” in me. That part of me that has been lying dormant for some time now, but is reawakening.

In the last year-and-a-bit after having lost two jobs in six months I’ve heard many people say to me; “everything happens for a reason;” “don’t worry it will all work out,” “trust God, He’ll make a way.” As I begin to look back on that part of my journey I can see how God’s hand has been at play. I am beginning to believe that God has brought me to this place so that I can once again rely on Him to be my provider, to trust in Him again, to guide my steps, to bring me to that place where He wants me. At this moment, that place is here, a place where I’m dialoguing about what I’m living and what I’m going through spiritually.  I honestly believe that if it weren’t for my job losses I wouldn’t be in this place.

It’s not easy, but God never gives us more than we can handle, because when it starts to get rough and it starts to get difficult, those are the times of growth and the times where we need to press into God more to gives us the strength to see us through. Sometimes we need to broken in order to be made whole again. And although I wouldn’t say that I’m broken right now, I am at that place where I’m willing to say: “God; I need you to get me through this, I need to rely on you, trust you and seek your will for my life.”

Today is the start of a brand new day, I can’t change yesterday, I don’t know what tomorrow brings, but today I’m going to go after God. I’m going to seek Him and His will for today. Yes, I know I may stumble, yes, I’m scared out of my mind and the statements I’m making, but I know that I have to put a stake and the ground and get going.

As I was writing the last little bit I remembered how Peter had to have faith to step out of the boat to walk on water. So I went and looked up that passage in the Bible. And, it spoke to me more than just that little bit that I had remembered. In the passage Jesus walks out to meet the disciples in their boat and they are afraid.  Here’s what it says:

Jesus said to them: “Take courage! It is I. Don’t be afraid.”

“Lord, if it’s you,” Peter replied, “tell me to come to you on the water.”

“Come,” he said.

Then Peter got down out of the boat, walked on the water and came toward Jesus. But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, “Lord, save me!”

Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught him. “You of little faith,” he said, “why did you doubt?” – Matthew 14:28-31

So, basically what I got out of that is this – “Eric, if you are going to go after God, put your eyes on Him, trust in Him and don’t let the obstacles that surround you pull you down. I’ve given you the faith to believe in signs and wonders and in the miraculous, keep your eyes on me and I will see you through.”

I’m chuckling to myself right now because I had no idea where I was going when I first started blogging back in December. Isn’t it funny how God works?